02 May 2009

there are things that drift away, like our endless, numbered days

BNCOC, Day 2

Up at 0530 (I stayed at the NCOA last night, since Tree is still at drill), feeling stiff and foggy.

FREEZING FUCKING SHOWER.

Got dressed, stood in formation, ate chow.

"Do Not Sexually Harrass Your Buddy" (the opposite of "Make Your Buddy Smile" ?)

"Why the FRG is awesome"

There was one other class on referring help to Soldiers who are considering/threatening suicide... then I got home and realized what day it is...

I think of you all the time, Mr. Yamaha. It's been two years today, but the pain and shock is still fresh. I hate you for what you did, and I hate you for never giving me the chance to repair the rift that formed between us (I'll admit, I was a huge bitch that night in your driveway), because maybe I could have been there for you. You could have called me. You're such an asshole, but I love you, and I miss you, and it's aways going to haunt me the way everything happened. If you're up there, out there, somewhere and can hear me, I'm sorry. Rest in peace, my friend.

Oh, and I'm probably not going to create a post for every day of BNCOC. Every day is pretty much going to be exactly the same, and since I'm fairly certain I'm the only one reading these posts...

Catch you all in two weeks. Unless something wicked crazy/weird/exciting happens. Doubt it.

"there are things we can't recall,
blind as night that finds us all"

- Iron and Wine "Passing Afternoon" -

3 comments:

13 Stoploss said...

no envy there, sarge.

Angel said...

you are NOT the only one reading these posts.

Malibu Niki said...

13,

You sure you don't miss the stupidity, just a little? It sure is funny - after it's over...

Angel,

Aw, thanks love. I was just feeling gloomy that day. BNCOC sucks and it was the 2 year anniversary of Mr. Yamaha's suicide... a tough week.